I hear my friends talking excitedly about their big plans. Big smiles fill their faces when they spread their arms to hug the world. They talk with confidence about college and marriage and licenses and work and growing older. But I don’t want to think about that, because I’m not ready, so I walk away to a dark window and calm my frightened breathing while gazing out at the night. I wonder if I’ll ever feel like things are under control. I wish time would stop so I could try to smooth everything out before moving on. And that’s when I feel younger than I am, because I’m too old to be so unsure.
(But I don't feel this way all the time. ;-) This is a portion of a paper I wrote for my writing class.)